Ten Polar Bears

Camp Geronimo in Arizona is an exciting place for Boy Scouts. Preston was so eager to go as a new Tenderfoot, and I tagged along for the week. We had a wonderful time. One of his big anticipations was the Polar Bear swim. It was a three-day morning ritual in which all participants would run down to the pool at 6:00 a.m., jump in at one side, swim across (amidst freezing screams), and jump out the other side. If you do the Polar Bear all three mornings, it earns you a special Polar Bear patch. Preston wanted that patch. So at 6:00 a.m., we trucked on down to the pool, and I watch dutifully by the pool fence with the other dads (caveat: A SUPER amazing dad would do the Polar Bear with his son. I am only an amazing dad). Anyway, I stood by fence for what seemed like an hour, as line after line of scouts jumped into the pool and popped out the other side. Soon it was over. But still no Preston. I went around the front side of the pool entrance, and there is was, teary and distraught. He hadn’t had the nerve to jump in, and now he couldn't earn the patch. That afternoon, he visited with his scoutmaster, who suggested if he did it TWICE the next morning, he could still earn the patch. We mentally prepped the rest of the evening, and Preston was pumped. By morning, out came Preston ready to go. I watched him jump in, swim across, and jump out, just to run around and do it again. And then a THIRD time! He was so proud of himself. He had learned he could do hard things. And just to prove it to himself, he did it TEN times in a row on the third morning!

LESSON LEARNED: We can do hard things in life, and it is amazing when each of us comes to his or her own realization of this.

FEEDBACK: WHAT DIFFICULT TASK DID YOU THINK WAS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO, BUT THAT YOU WERE SO PROUD OF WHEN YOU FINALLY PULLED IT OFF?

A Wife's Love

When we got married, one of the first things Kathleen said to me was, “I’m just glad I didn’t marry a doctor!” “No worries for that”, I reassured. I was secure in my engineering degree. Though I had briefly considered going into medicine when I came home from my mission, the dog-eat-dog world of premedical students had been a complete turn-off for me, and I quickly transitioned into engineering. During my senior year before graduation, I was playing my flute in the honors woodwind quintet for BYU. While traveling to an elementary school for a concert, our bassoonist who was driving announced that he had just been accepted to medical school. “How is that possible?”, I asked, “You’re a music major!” He proceeded to explain that you can have a degree in anything and still go into medicine. At that moment, I was overwhelmed with a spiritual confirmation that I was going to be a doctor. It was totally unsolicited and unexpected. I didn’t dare say a thing, not even to my wife for two days. But she knowingly asked me at that point, “Ok, what’s going on?” It was then I told her what had been revealed to me. She paused for only a few moments before saying. “Ok. I will support you through the whole thing”.

LESSON LEARNED: Never underestimate the love and charity of a dedicated spouse.

FEEDBACK: WHAT UNEXPECTED EVIDENCE OF LOVING SUPPORT HAS YOUR SPOUSE OR FAMILY MEMBER PROVIDED?

The Golden Flute

The acoustics of metals and the sounds they produce is a fascinating science. In flute making for instance, it is no coincidence that the more precious and costly the metal, the more acoustically resonant the instrument becomes. Silver is by far the most commonly used material in flute making due to its reasonable cost-to-sound trade off. But gold makes for the ultimate sound quality in an instrument, and for years I dreamed of having a gold flute. When Kathleen and I were newlyweds, I was able to sell my prized silver flute for enough money that, coupled with our generous wedding gifts, would provide enough money to live on for a year. But my remarkable bride, on hearing of my dream, suggested we use this money to get that gold flute I had always wanted. We had just enough money to make that a reality. It was so tempting, and in my naivety I seriously considered it. But logic quickly overruled, and it was a very good thing it did. It would have led to financial ruin for us very early on, and destroyed so many of our future dreams. Ironically, it was less than three months later that I had an epiphany to change my career from engineering to medicine. The rash decision to spend all our precious savings on a gold flute would have made that dream impossible. Funny how we get to choose which of our dreams will become our realities.  The golden flute parable applies to many of the blessings we have received in our marriage. Now, many years into my established practice, I can afford that gold flute if I so choose. But I choose not to. The golden flute that never was has turned out to be the most priceless treasure I have ever had.

LESSON LEARNED: The Lord will give us whatever we desire life, but it is the blending of proper choices with appropriate timing that enriches life.

FEEDBACK: HAVE YOU EVER MADE OR BEEN CLOSE TO MAKING A RASH FINANCIAL DECISION, AND HAD TO LEARN HARD LIFE LESSONS FROM THE EXPERIENCE?

Ice Cream Ticket

When Brandon was small and started playing Little League, I made him the same deal I did the other boys – hit a homerun and win ice cream with dad. Sure enough, early into the season, Brandon smacked one into the outfield and earned his prize. Afterwards, as we zipped along the side streets in my car, I suddenly saw a policeman flashing me in my rearview mirror. The old 40 mph in the 25 mph zone trick – he got me. While I was fishing out my identification, he glanced at Brandon sitting behind me in the rear passenger seat with the window down. Brandon had on his gear, the officer said, “Off to a game, son?”. “Naw”, said Brandon, “just came from one. I hit a homerun. We’re supposed to be getting ice cream”. The policeman stared incredulously at Brandon. “Are you serious?” he said. “Yeah”, replied Brandon. “We’re supposed to be getting ice cream. Right now”. The officer stared at my license for a moment, and then handing it back said, “Let’s watch that speed, O.K?” And to Brandon: “Go get your ice cream, kid”. I bought him whichever sized ice cream his little heart desired.

LESSON LEARNED: Ah, the innocence of youth – its simply invaluable.

FEEDBACK: DO YOU HAVE ANY FAVORITE BASEBALL STORIES? 

Get the Phone

Sunday afternoon naps were our weekly ritual when the kids were small. After a busy day of church attendance, meals and activities, Kathleen and I would often toggle our siestas as we passed out in the late afternoons. One Sunday, as I was slumbering in my recliner chair, I was startled by the phone ringing. After drifting back off, it rang again. This keep repeating, and it was agitating since it got all mixed up in my groggy dream-state, together with all the snickering. Wait - snickering? As I finally came to my senses, I realized that there was a gaggle of kiddies right outside my door, and the snickering followed each new ring of the phone. Finally awake, I was able to pinpoint the source and connect the dots to these little terrorists. My cellphone had been strategically planted under my recliner pillow, and the kids were calling me over and over from the home phone.

LESSON LEARNED: There are reasons some parents eat their young.

FEEDBACK: WHAT SUNDAY AFTERNOON PRANKS DID YOUR KIDS PLAY ON YOU?

Dad's Bobble Head

A number of years ago while at Disneyland, my daughter Karen persuaded me to go on the Indiana Jones ride with her.  I had some trepidation, mainly because I’m not a roller coaster-type person.  I hate all the jerking and I get nauseous real easy.  But her pleadings won me over, and we found ourselves in line.  No sooner had we been seat-belted into the car than Karen announced she was terrified and that I HAD to put my arm around her neck the whole ride.  I protested that there was no way - I had to use both my arms to clutch the lap bar in a death grip.  But she wouldn’t hear of it.   So I “HAD” to put my left arm around her neck, leaving only my right one to preserve my life.  I have two memories of this ride of terror.  The first is that my head jerked around like a bobble head doll’s the whole way and I was sure I would get whiplash.  My second memory is that as soon as the ride began, Karen opened her mouth into one prolonged scream that carried through the entire duration.  And yes, my unprotected left ear took the brunt of it.  I wouldn’t trade this memory for the world.

LESSON LEARNED:  Maidens in distress will occasionally request that their dashing fathers save them.

FEEDBACK:  WHAT HERO-PARENT STORIES DO YOU RECALL THAT WERE AS PAINFUL AS THEY ARE MEMORABLE?

Baby Girl's Birthday

Today is our little daughter Aubrey’s birthday.  Also known as “Baby Girl” via me, she is away from home at Snow College but still here in our hearts.  Baby Girl is a fitting nickname for this gal, because it mirrors so many of the memories we have had together.  She is our St. Louis souvenir, as she was born during my medical training in Missouri.  Many a late night we would pace the floor together so mom could catch up on needed sleep.  Her little eyes would stare unblinking up into mine in the semi-darkness, vigilantly assessing that I was still there and wouldn’t put her down.  Since then, she never has wanted to be left behind, and would call out “Inago” (I want to go) as a little girl anytime someone left the house.  She gratefully transitioned into the role of assistant mother when little brother Brandon was born.  It was then that she had her "on-the-go" wish, and drove Brandon endlessly around the yard in our plastic car for two as they went on errands together.  Today she is nineteen, and is she is soon to be on-the-go on a mission for the Church.  We are so proud of you, Baby Girl, and all the great places you are going.  Happy Birthday!

LESSON LEARNED:  Parenthood is fleeting, but the little memories are gifts that linger behind. 

FEEDBACK:  WHAT HAS BEEN YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH THE MEMORIES OF YOUR LITTLE ONES?